Thursday, December 6, 2018

Getting Results: Becoming Emotionally Intelligent


A641.3.3 RB – Working with EI: Getting Results


The human being is a conglomeration of many various traits, aspects, and characteristics.  As humans, we are presented with many physicals opportunities that allow us to grow and become stronger.  These abilities are learned behaviors.  For instance, surgeons are miracle workers that save millions of lives each year.  Their articulate and precise actions during surgery can repair a broken heart valve, reduce swelling the brain, or even implant lenses into the back of the eye.  While it may seem difficult and challenging to perform, surgeons, through years of experience and years of residency, have trained their hand and finger muscles to perform the surgery almost to perfection.  This training of muscle coordination is what is considered muscle memory.  The same application is with our emotions as human beings.  Through years of training and practice, an individual can train their memory and increase their intelligence of emotions to handle stressful, over-joyous, and even difficult situations.  This memory allows individuals to be great leaders and to be a guide and help to those around them.  To achieve this memory of emotional intelligence, Dr. Daniel Goleman has implied that self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and social skills all play vital and crucial parts.  Self-awareness is the basic notion and idea that humans cannot undergo an experience without being conscious or aware of undergoing that experience in a sense to be explicated (Nida-Rumelin, 2017).  We must be aware of the situation that we are in to understand what is actually happening.  Leaders have gone through years of experience and been in precarious situations where they have become self-aware of the surroundings.  Knowing what worked to overcome the situation allows them to remember and be more self-conscious the next time a similar situation arises.  Self-management is not just about reacting to events, but to be creating and leading one’s own actions (Howe et al, 2013).  Having a solid understanding of composure during challenging times gives courage and confidence to those around them.  In addition, having experience emotionally during challenging times allows for good leaders to seek for new methods of solution and to accept the repercussions of their choices.  This self-management is healthy and, as said before, during trying times, allows leaders to not crumble but to stand poised and to be ready to make positive decisions to lead others.  The formation of positive social awareness in oneself allows for an individual to be accepting of others and be an individual that is easily approached.  In my life, I have known many managers who were so socially awkward that I steered clear of them. I had a previous manager who would bring her personal life into our work environment that was a little “too-much-information” to say the least.  Multiple times I almost sought out HR to discuss my feelings of discomfort. This was a challenge as my manager was not socially aware of her words and actions.  From those experiences, however, I have learned to not mimic hers and to be socially aware of my boundaries and to not cross a line that might be offensive or repulsive to another.  Being socially aware comes from the positive social skills that go hand-in-hand.  Developing positive social skills, a leader can come down to a level as their employees and give a sense of understanding.  In addition, it shows humility.  Humble leaders are excellent teachers.  In my personal life I try to be the social butterfly.  My skills allow me to reach people who at times were the most challenging individuals to work with.  Even through our difficult times at work, we still are friends and can always have a positive moment together.  That speaks a lot about good, emotionally intelligent leaders. I strive each day to do just that.  I feel that my social awareness and skills are my strong points. I feel that I could develop my self-management skills better, especially in times of deadlines and depression.  I suffer from mild depression that can hinder my self-awareness and management skills.  However, being a people person, I find that teaching others brings positive moments in my life and bring me out of those slumps.  I enjoy leading by teaching and being an example.  I hope that my efforts will continue to allow me to become more emotionally intelligent and that someday I can leader others to be successful managers, CEOs, and friends! 


References
Howe, Kate, Gray, Ivan, & Brown, Keith (2013). Chapter 4: The Management and Leadership of ‘self’ in Supervision. Effective Supervision in Social Work. Sage Knowledge. DOI: http://dx.doi.org.ezproxy.libproxy.db.erau.edu/10.4135/9781526401625.n4

Nida-Rumelin, Martine (2017). Self-Awareness. Review of Philosophy and Psychology. 8(1). Pgs. 55-82

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